My husband has been away on business quite a bit lately. We’ve been managing pretty well, although when Marc came home this past weekend, I told him I could really use some help dealing with the evening routines. By day’s end, Mom is tired, even if no one else is. And, it seems, I get the least cooperation from the children when I most need it. So if there is a time when I get overwhelmed, that would definitely be it.

Yesterday was a great day in many ways. But of course, by the time we started our evening routines, I was worn pretty thin. When (in the midst of dinner preparations) I discovered a mass of potting soil dumped over the window sill and onto off-white carpet, I nearly lost it. No, I think I DID lose it. From there on, it seemed to be one thing after another. When we sat down for our family devotions, I apologized to the children for my irritable mood. I had to laugh when my seven year-old said, “If it was morning time, we could re-boot and everything would be fine. Since it’s already bed time, there’s not much we can do.”

So I was reminded of a trick that really WORKS FOR ME. It’s called the RE-BOOT, and it greatly improves the atmosphere of our home (as long as we remember to do it when needed.) If you have been following along as we blog the book, “The Values-Driven Family,” you’ve already seen it. But, it’s worth repeating. I’m going to paste it below–a direct excerpt from VDF so that I don’t have to re-invent the wheel. Visit Rocks in my Dryer for more WFMW tips!
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Improving the Mood: Dealing with Irritability and Frustration

Has this ever happened in your home?: the baby cried at 4 AM and you couldn’t go back to sleep; the dog got sick on the carpet; the toddler who was partially potty trained peed on the floor three times in a row, for the first time in over a week; the older siblings are perpetually whining and arguing. And as for getting any housework done…! As a result, you are barking out commands to “behave” and “be quiet.” In response to your irritable orders, the children are in a crabby mood, too. You see that there is no end in sight. Yet, it’s only 9:45! You know you’re not going to make it through the day.

This is a very slight exaggeration of a true story—this was us one day! I (Marc) was busy working in my office and took it all in. My pregnant wife then went to the grocery store, children in tow. When she got home, she said that the kids exhibited the worst behavior she had ever experienced with them. I, of course (being the sensitive man that I am), responded, “I could have predicted that.”

You see, when everyone is worn thin and everybody is in a bad mood (frustrated, tired, or just plain irritable), things do not just change by themselves. In fact, you can expect the tone in the home to go from bad to worse, if left unchecked. After this incident, I talked to my wife, all the while thinking that the situation was somewhat what it feels like when my computer is acting up. It can be painfully slow or some features can simply stop working. So how do I respond (being as patient as I am with computers)? I click faster and harder and get frustrated that things just seem to slow down more—or, ultimately, the computer just seizes. How do I get things back to normal again? Reboot: Control—Alt—Delete! Immediately I saw how the concept can also apply to the family.

First, control the situation. Recognize that the environment is not healthy and that the team can’t continue down this path. In our home, we stop everything and call a REBOOT. Everyone gathers in a room and sits down. I (or Cindy, if I am not there) tell the family that the mood is dismal and must change.

Next, alter the path. Ask the family if they want to have a blessed day. Ask them if they feel blessed now. Then tell them that we need to start over and live by the core values so that we can experience the joy, peace, and success God has in store for us that day.

Finally, delete the past. All misdeeds are forgiven. Children receive a clean slate for their encouragement charts and full opportunity to get all their marks. Every person (moody adults included) must give every other member of the family hugs and kisses and tell them they are sorry for being crabby or for doing whatever it was they had done to contribute to the mood crisis.

This method is exceptional! It really works. We have done this and have turned the tone 180 degrees in our home. Rebooting is a staple part of maintaining peace and joy in our home. It helps parents and children alike to recognize that peace, joy, and success are a choice. We as a family unit can set a joyful and loving tone in the home. Implementing this method encourages everyone in the family to come on board as a team and choose to take advantage of the new start offered.

This is a great reflection of the grace that God extends to us through Christ, offering a fresh start when we’ve chosen the wrong path and come to him in repentance. We urge you to try this method in order to reduce the expression of negative emotions that threaten to wreak havoc in your home. The Bible says, “Better a dry crust with peace and quiet than a house full of feasting with strife” (Proverbs 17:1)—this is so true! Little else matters in a home with a negative tone.