In our last e-newsletter, I talked about how I’m re-grouping in my parenting, and some of the things I’m focusing on. One of the main things is LOVE. I mentioned briefly how important it is to express love in a way that it is received–maybe you’re familiar with the “five love languages” as an example of that. So that’s by way of preface to something that happened over this weekend…
I’ve been asked to once again take up the habit of writing back and forth to some of the children in dedicated notebooks–a practice we all enjoyed in the states but that hasn’t carried over into Africa, unfortunately, since things have been rather busy. This past week has been a joy of re-connecting in a new way with several of my children. And then, two of my girls decided that they were going to start writing to each other. They’ve been scribbling notes to one another, mostly talking about the games they will play or drawing sweet pictures of them hugging each other. I stumbled upon the notebook on Saturday and sat perusing it, smiling. Then, my smile faded when I read this exchange:
…”Can we love each other, please?”…
“Of course I love you! You are my sister.”
“It didn’t seem like you love me.”
It filled me with sadness to have one of my children feel…unloved. The frustrating part is that she is loved, and she just doesn’t feel like she is. How often does that happen with various family members, during the different seasons of life that we struggle through? With my girls’ permission, I shared what they wrote with the family during our evening devotional time and just encouraged them all to keep on loving one another. It’s as simple as this:
Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.” (Philippians 2:3-4)
And this:
“In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you want them to treat you” (Matthew 7:12)
This was a wonderful and helpful exhortation. One of my greatest prayers is that my children learn to love and serve each other with their whole hearts, and I am always encouraging them that way. But how much better will it be now that I have been reminded to teach them to love each other in the ways each appreciates it and give them the tools to love each other. I am already making a mental list of exhortations to each of my children to be able to express their love in specific ways to their siblings based on what is important to each and how they feel and see things and respond! Thank you so much for sharing!