Those of you who know me, know that I have historically battled depression but have experienced victory through Christ in the past several years. I don’t believe that discouragement or depression are sin, but certainly they can lead us to sin. As well, when we take our focus off of God and put it on ourselves, that is self-love and self-glorification–which is an affront to God. Because of my history and my disposition, I am often “tempted” to give in to negative emotions and I have learned that I have to be vigilant to recognize the enemy’s schemes, and his subtle voice–the voice of a liar who comes to do nothing but steal and destroy. Emotions are an area of weakness for me and surely the enemy knows that.

I also am aware that times of transition are particularly good opportunities for the enemy to gain an advantage. Frankly, I don’t like change. At all. So when I have to deal with life change–especially multiple “changes”– I have to be on guard. The move to Africa has been no exception. Tiredness and sickness are also “triggers” that can precipitate episodes of discouragement or depression–and those, too, have been part of the experience here this past month. There have been many moments when I’ve had to cling to various Scriptures of hope and promise. I’ve made myself get up early every morning for time with the Lord, no matter how busy things have been and how tired I am as a result. I’ve let myself cry a couple of times but then, like a good soldier, I give myself a kick in the pants and get back up again. All I can say is, God has been incredibly faithful.

Something new in the emotional struggle is fear. I can’t say that I’ve faced the demon of fear very frequently in my life, so it has been a bit of a surprise–but I’m dealing with it the same way I’ve dealt with other negative emotions. I’m not letting the enemy have the victory! In the flesh, there are many things I could fear…but I’m choosing to focus on God, not on the lies of the enemy. And I’m trusting that if anything negative should happen, it will be for my good and God’s glory.

This week I have been meditating on 1 Peter 3:1-6, focusing on the latter part of verse 6: “you have become her [Sarah’s] children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. ” It is comforting to know that holy women of the past have felt fear, but have overcome that fear through righteousness.

God is good…all the time.

 

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