Author: valuesdr

Works for Me Wednesday: Reluctant Reader

valuesdr

I was talking with a friend from church a while back, about our “reluctant readers.” We were sympathizing with each other about our second-born children, who were struggling in the area of reading. The cause, for them, is not that they “can’t” read, but that reading is not yet a habit and they have not yet experienced the benefits of it.
Both of these children have older siblings who read fluently, learn readily by reading more advanced material, and are excited about reading. Our second-borns, however, will read during “school time,” but otherwise don’t want to invest much effort.
On the one hand, they tend to compare themselves to their older siblings and feel as though they are reading “baby” books (easy readers) in comparison to what their siblings are doing. On the other hand, because they don’t pursue reading independently, they don’t experience the “success” that would intrinsically motivate them to continue reading at higher levels. It’s a catch-22–at least in our cases.
Whether you have a “reluctant reader” because of his/her birth order, or just because, I thought I would share a couple of things that have worked for me in this area.
One thing I did to combat the “comparison” syndrome (which is part of what discourages my second-born from reading on his own) was to get my two oldest boys each a similar “bag of books” for Christmas. I found some excellent Book Packs of leveled readers from DK Eyewitness that fit my objectives perfectly. Each boy got a set of readers, which although different reading levels, looked alike enough that my second-born didn’t think he got “baby readers.” (Frankly, I think it was intriguing enough just to get brand-spanking-new books in a ZIPPERED CASE!) The pictures in both sets are great, and my sons also loved the topics–one, an animal lover, got the animal series, and the other got a history set–he loves facts and information! The 10 readers also came with a couple of activity pages and a checklist with star stickers so that the child can “star” each book as he reads it.
Now with homeschooling multiple children and juggling older children with younger, I guess I’ve forgotten how much young ones LOVE stickers! DS #2 was thrilled with the star stickers and checklist in this set! Right away he set everything out on his desk and asked to read in bed for several nights in a row. And he dutifully “starred” each checkbox as the books were finished. I was almost dismayed that I had gotten out of the habit of reinforcing good work with such a simple thing as a sticker!

I have now made up a template in MS Word that will allow me to list titles of books (or other school assignments), with space to put a sticker upon their successful completion. If you’d like a copy, just email me via the “contact” form in the side bar and request the “WFMW chart” in the comments section. Note that you’ll automatically receive future editions of our “Values-Driven” newsletter, unless you check the opt-out box.

Another thing we’ve done is to ask DS#2 to spend time reading aloud to Dad after “lights-out.” Not every night, but we try for at least 2 or 3 per week. First of all, he loves being permitted to stay up later than the other kids. Secondly, the time with Dad is generally coveted all around. All of the kids just “glow” with praise from their Daddy! It’s different when it comes from me, because I’m with them everyday, all the time–and I’m the teacher! Dad is different. I can’t explain it, I just know it’s true. So he regularly picks one of his leveled readers and snuggles on the couch to read a book to Dad. If this option doesn’t work for you, is there another person to whom your child could read aloud–a grandparent or aunt, perhaps?
With these two things done together in a short space of time, I can see a marked improvement just in the past couple of weeks since Christmas. Not only is he reading aloud with less hesitation over pronunciation, etc., but he is more likely to pick up a book and actually “read” on his own–or at least try, even if it is a more advanced-level text. That definitely works for me!

Make sure to visit Rocks in my Dryer for more great tips every Wednesday!

Parenting and the Power of Suggestion

valuesdr

Before starting each new homeschool year, my husband and I talk about our goals and objectives for our children and the various ways we might use homeschooling as a vehicle for accomplishing those goals. I spend some time going through traditional scope and sequence materials for the different grade levels of my children and develop a bulleted list of the things our academic curriculum should cover. I know that we don’t homeschool in the same way that others do; in fact, the flexibility of homeschooling is one of the reasons why it’s such an ideal way to disciple your children and prepare them for life. We don’t “have to” do it just like the public schools, like the alternative schools, or even like our fellow homeschoolers!

Even with all of this careful planning, and with the understanding that everyone’s homeschool methods differ, I still occasionally see something done by another homeschool family and think, “Should we be doing that?” I wonder if we’re missing something. I worry that my children aren’t doing enough academically. I question many things that just a short time earlier had been unquestionable. Thankfully, when I bring these concerns to my husband he always sets me straight—reminding me again that why we homeschool drives how we homeschool, and that we don’t have to “keep up with the Joneses.”

It never ceases to amaze me, though, how the wind gets taken out of my sails by seemingly insignificant things. My confidence can fail just because I decide to compare myself to someone else’s standards rather than the standard that God has given me. Once I get back on track, I’m stronger for it—but it’s sometimes an uphill climb to overcome the doubts and questions that can attack my mind.

I was thinking about this “power of suggestion” in my time of prayer this morning. Just as it doesn’t take much for me to lose confidence in some areas, I think the same is true for my children. Likewise, though, a simple encouragement can go far in the opposite direction, to strengthen a weakness and spur someone on. As parents, the power of suggestion is one of the many tools we have in our toolbox. Sometimes we use it in a harmful manner (often inadvertently or without thinking), and sometimes we use it for good. The latter takes a great deal more thought and effort, at least for me. I am, by nature, a more critical sort of person, so I try to be proactively positive with my children to counter-balance my natural tendencies.

My oldest son has a habit of making me a card saying, “I love you, Mom!” when it seems like I am having a bad day. I don’t know how he started doing it, but I noticed that he very often does. On one particular day, my son was struggling with his attitude and was not responding to the usual encouragements. By the end of the day he was still a bit down. So while he slept, I made him a card, letting him know that I loved him and was praying for him. I taped it to the headboard of his bed. I don’t know how he was feeling when he woke up, but by the time I saw him he was all smiles. Some time later, I noticed my handmade card in his “treasure box”—all the little things he stores up as memories. It didn’t take much to get things going in a more positive direction—it was just the power of suggestion.

I also recall how effective it was in my Children’s Church class to hand out “certificates of achievement” at the end of each session—for the most active participant, the best cleaner-upper, the most polite student, and so on. It’s amazing how such a little token could really promote a positive atmosphere. Don’t overlook these things in what can be the day-to-day grind of parenting. In fact, that’s why my husband and I started using a daily “Core Value Encouragement Chart” with our children. It’s a concrete reminder for our kids of the blessing that accompanies their sincere efforts to live the Word of God and exhibit Christlike character. It has been a very effective tool for this purpose.

On the other hand, I can think of instances where the power of suggestion has resulted in negative outcomes rather than positive ones. When I use statements with a child like “You always…” or “You never…” (and they’re usually negative in nature), it sends the message to the child that I have certain expectations for their actions or behavior, and so it doesn’t do them any good to try something different. In fact, my own expectations or assumptions often blind me to the fact that a particular child is actually making progress in a given area.

So it’s pretty obvious that both our actions and our words can have significant effects on our children’s attitudes and behaviors, whether in a negative direction or positive. Recently, though, I’ve been meditating on how our overall tone can be a powerful suggestion as well. Our tone is self-perpetuating throughout our home, in more ways than we realize. We can say things that seem encouraging, but are we saying them in a positive way, and with a genuine heart? I think of how a child can come to me with a work of art—all of their effort poured into it—and if I’m in the middle of something, I can take a quick glance and mumble, “That’s really nice, sweetie.” But they know that my heart isn’t in it, and what was meant to encourage the child will probably have the opposite effect.

I’d like to leave you with a poem that had a great deal of impact on me, and in fact made me think a little more deeply about the power of suggestion and the effects of my tone in the home. I’m reprinting it from a study called “Gatekeepers of the Home” by Nancy Campbell (visit www.aboverubies.org for this and other helpful, Biblical studies and encouragements for wives and mothers). The original author is listed as unknown.

The Tone of Voice

It’s not so much what you say
As the manner in which you say it;
It’s not so much the language you use
As the tone in which you convey it;
“Come Here!” I sharply said,
And the child cowered and wept.
“Come here,” I said—
He looked up and smiled
And straight to my lap he crept.
Words may be mild and fair
And the tone may pierce like a dart;
Words may be soft as the summer air
But the tone may break my heart;
For words come from the mind
Grow by study and art—but tone leaps from the inner self
Revealing the state of the heart.
Whether you know it or not,
Whether you are mean or care,
Gentleness, kindness, love and hate,
Envy, anger are there.
Then, would you quarrels avoid
And peace and love rejoice?
Keep anger not only out of your words—
Keep it out of your voice.

A Lesson from History

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Recently, my grandfather (an 86 year-old WWII veteran) self-published his autobiography, primarily for the family. It is an amazing history of his youth in Oklahoma during the Great Depression, his enlistment in the army at the age of 17, his 3-1/2 years as a prisoner of war of the Japanese, and then his post-war career and family life. We have been reading aloud from his story in the evenings as a family, and it has been a neat experience to have history really come alive in this way.

We just got a new puppy, and the baby has not been sleeping through the night regularly enough. So between the two of them, I’m either getting up for the baby crying and wanting to nurse or the puppy whining from his crate (either for some company or to go outside to potty). Honestly, I am just way too tired, and that never helps things. So I was having a bit of a difficult time going into the morning anyway…and what did I decide to do but balance the checkbook? That probably wasn’t wise because it stressed me out way too much. The older children did their reading, writing and math but we didn’t get to the electives that I had hoped to, so I was feeling frustrated about that. But then I thought about my Grandfather’s story.

When he enlisted in the army, he recalled saying goodbye to his father. He wrote, “Little did I know that we would not see each other again for five years.” And even when they did see each other again, it was not to be reunited as a family; my grandfather would only return to say goodbye to his family and then travel across the country to CT to marry the army nurse whom he had met post-war. He had younger siblings that he would barely know. One sister was born while he was in the service, who would never know her oldest brother as a part of the nuclear family. So as I was feeling a little frustrated about what “didn’t” get done today, I was listening to what we WERE doing. While I made some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, my oldest was talking to his Grandma on the phone. All of my younger children were playing some rousing game of pretend in the girls’ bedroom. Laughing. Playing together. Enjoying one another. So, no, we didn’t “do” some of the school-related things that I had hoped to check off of our to-do list…but look at what memories my children were making, and the relationships they were building. We will never have this day again. One day, we will not be a family in the same way that we are today. So I am glad for what we did “accomplish” today. Oh, I am getting way too sappy, aren’t I?

Then I got to thinking…yes, family is important. I want us to enjoy each other. But we also need to have an eternal perspective as children in the family of God. What did we do today that was of eternal significance? What DID we do that won’t really matter when we go to be with the Lord? Just out of curiosity, I asked the children what they thought was eternally significant about their day. My 3 year-old said that she shared her toys with her little sister. My 4 year-old daughter said she was diligent about doing dishes with her sister–did most of them herself, in fact. And, she reminded me, God wants us to be diligent! My younger son said that he was diligent in his schoolwork, and read aloud some stories to his sisters. My oldest son said that he was diligent about his schoolwork as well, and he had spent some time with his dad before Daddy left for the week. And what did I do? Ultimately (after a bit of a rough start), I enjoyed my children and tried to make sure that they enjoyed each other. I reminded them that it’s not all about “today.” One thing that I didn’t do was sweep under the kitchen table after lunch. Not that it didn’t “need” to get done…but the crumbs weren’t that bad, and I decided I’d rather hang out with my boys for a while.

"Counterfeit Christianity" and the Power of Authenticity

valuesdr

This week I decided to potty train our daughter, who is turning two next week. That requires some micro-management, since we use the “diaperless” method. I’m trying to keep her occupied with pleasant diversions and confined to the kitchen so clean-ups are easy when they need to happen. Hopefully she’ll catch on soon. In the mean time, at least my kitchen floors are getting mopped this week…multiple times, even!

On Monday and Tuesday, the potty-training process went smoothly. Although it was difficult to balance with the other demands of life (baby, homeschooling, home management, etc.), it was all do-able. Yesterday, on the other hand, I suddenly felt like I just couldn’t cope—I couldn’t do it all! I have to admit, I kind of fell apart. The baby was crying and unusually fussy. Why?! I just couldn’t figure it out, and that was disturbing enough in itself. Then—uh, oh!—there’s another puddle on the floor! And there was my dawdler…on his own too long and guess what? He sat at his desk for a half-hour with almost no progress on his writing assignment. After running between upstairs and downstairs for the umpteenth-time, I walked through my boys’ room. They were supposed to have cleaned their room for morning jobs, and it just didn’t look like I expected it to. So I kind of lost it. Yeah, I yelled. Nagged. Complained. Knew that I was responding in totally the wrong way, but just could not control myself. It was just TOO MUCH. And yes, then I came back and apologized. But of course, the damage was already done. Thankfully, my kids are pretty forgiving.

So as I started my day with the Lord today, I had to repent, and reflect on yesterday. I was reminded that I need to be more active in “standing firm” and growing in spiritual maturity. I talked with the Lord about my concerns that my own failings would cause my children to disregard my well-intentioned teachings when it comes to matters of faith. But God reminded me of something important; something that I know, but that needed emphasis once again. And here it is (are you ready?): when it comes to making sure that my children will walk with the Lord, yes, my example is of utmost importance. BUT, it’s not just about appearances, it’s about authenticity.

Sure, I can look good—to my children and just about everyone else, on the outside. I can manage the home to a “T,” successfully integrate homeschooling into our daily routine and make sure that my kids measure up academically. I can look like I can just “do it all.” But, let’s face it, there are times when I fall woefully short—particularly when it comes to expressing Christlike character on a consistent basis. That’s where it’s important to be authentic. If I recognize that I have not attained God’s ideal in a given circumstance, I can simply confess (to others and to God), pray for the Holy Spirit to help me in my weakness, and move on in faith. My children, and others in my sphere of influence, won’t be won to Christ because I am perfect. They will be won to Christ because I am perfectly forgiven and I can demonstrate the reality of His forgiveness on a moment-by-moment basis.

I think that the Pharisees were “perfect;” at least, they wanted everyone else to think so. They were leaders and teachers, after all. But although they “talked the talk,” Jesus advised people not to follow their example. Why? Because they had the appearance of faith but not an authentic walk with God (see Matthew 23).

This got me to thinking about hypocrisy in general. I think that our children (and others) are more likely to find Christianity attractive if we actually live what we believe. We can’t be “counterfeit Christians”—saying Christ has changed us, but living as we always have. I found an interesting article online about how to spot a counterfeit bill, and I think the lessons have some overlap spiritually, so I’ll share (the facts behind this were from http://crime.about.com/od/prevent/ss/counterfeit.htm).

Basically, the way to find a counterfeit is to compare it to what you know of an original—and “look for differences, not similarities.” Frankly, that’s what others do to us when they know that we are Christians. They compare us to the standard set forth by Christ (which is a perfect example, mind you) and most often they don’t see where we’re in line with that example, they point out where we deviate from it. It’s human nature, and the best way to spot a counterfeit, after all!

The biggest difference between a fake and the real deal, when it comes to money, is that many of the printed features in the original will be distinctive and well-defined; in a counterfeit, on the other hand, images may appear blurry or details fade into the background more. I thought that was striking, because another way that people challenge the authenticity of our faith is that we look no different than the culture around us—we try to “blend in” sometimes, don’t we? But we should stand out, and be set apart. That’s how we show ourselves as genuine followers of Christ.

These two facts I had some basic awareness of before reading the article. But here’s one thing that was new, and very interesting: “Genuine currency paper has tiny red and blue fibers embedded throughout. Often counterfeiters try to simulate these fibers by printing tiny red and blue lines on their paper. Close inspection reveals, however, that on the counterfeit note the lines are printed on the surface, not embedded in the paper.” Wow! Talk about convicting. There’s the whole “appearances” theme again—do you see it? As Christians, we want to make ourselves “look” a certain way—but our behaviors aren’t just things to “do”—they should be a reflection of Christ in us. He should be directing our thoughts, speech, and actions from within; the lifestyle of faith should be embedded in us.

Another way to spot a counterfeit is to hold it up to the light. When you do so, you should see several defining features, including a watermark, a security thread, and color-shifting ink. Do we appear genuine when we scrutinize ourselves under the light of God’s Word? Do others see us as authentic when they view us in light of Christ’s example? It’s a worthy test.

Winning others to Christ through our example is not about being perfect in appearance, it’s about being real. Others (our children included) will want what we have, and will be more inclined to give credence to our words, if we accompany them with a genuine lifestyle and a constant striving towards God. Should we shoot for perfection? Absolutely! After all, Jesus did say, “Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect” (Matthew 5:48). But, when we fall short, we can be transparent about our failures, seek reconciliation, model repentance, and pray for consistent progress by the power of the Holy Spirit. That’s what it’s all about.

Some of Our Favorite Sites

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Sometimes I love exploring link lists, other times I don’t feel like scrolling through them. When I do check out a new site, I have a bad habit of thinking, “Oh, this is cool!” and then I bookmark it, but don’t return to it regularly enough to make the most of it. My husband often complains about how disorganized my Favorites links are; maybe that’s why so many good sites languish there.

There are a few sites, however, that I’ve returned to more faithfully, so I wanted to compile a list that might be helpful to all you internets out there. I’ll try to keep it organized. I may update the list once in a while, but I’ll do my best to do it justice the first time around.

Home Management Links

 

  • www.moneysavingmom.com/. Links for printable coupons, the latest & greatest deals at stores like Walgreens, CVS, and Target, and tips for beginning bargain-hunters.

 

  • www.angelfoodministries.com. An income-independent food service programs whose mission is the stretch your family’s grocery dollar. They offer monthly packages of various kinds at very good prices. Some do not like the pre-packaged food items included, but AFM also offers a fresh fruit & veggie box that is a good value.

Homeschooling Links

    • www.oldfashionededucation.com. A sister site to Hillbilly Housewife, this site offers links to free homeschooling resources (literature and textbooks), organized by subject area.

 

  • www.gutenberg.org. Thousands of freely available, public-domain ebooks. These usually require some formatting before you print them yourself, but I like the solid Biblical and character emphases of many of these older texts. I haven’t found the search tool particularly user-friendly, but if you know what you’re looking for, this site is a must to bookmark.

 

 

  • www.kids.askacop.org. This is a site full of links related to safety (fire safety, stranger safety, road safety, and more). It has coloring and informational pages for kids as well as online games and safety-related stories. Being homeschoolers and, by default, home most of the time, it’s easy to feel insulated from dangers of various kinds–but we cannot overlook proactive training in this area.

 

 

  • www.crayola.com. This is one of my favorite sites for kids’ art. It has an online art tool, printable coloring pages, and lesson plans for neat activities that the whole family can do.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Parenting Sites

 

  • www.pluggedinonline.com/. Not a parenting site, but necessary for proactive parenting. Use this tool to evaluate current music, movies, video, and other media from a Christian perspective and make informed decisions for your children and family.

 

Spiritual/Church Sites

    • www.aboverubies.org/. This site has some wonderful articles to encourage women in their godly calling as wives, mothers, and managers of the home.

 

  • www.boldchristianliving.org/. Some informational articles on different aspects of Christian living and parenting; I always come away challenged to “come up higher” in my walk with God.

 

 

  • www.kidsofcourage.com/. This site has stories and activities about modern-day persecution in the Church, designed specifically for children. I’ve found this an invaluable site for sharing with the children 1) the blessing of being able to worship freely and 2) the reality of persecution when we stand for Christ. We also receive the free Voice of the Martyrs publication so that we can read through it as a family: www.persecution.com/.

 

 

 

 

 

Miscellaneous

 

  • www.worldnetdaily.com/. Marc’s favorite source for news with a Christian world view. No TV in our home. Internet news is Marc’s means of staying current.

 

  • www.wikipedia.org/. An online, open-source encyclopedia–a great place to begin your research.

New Year Action Item: Character Training

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With the hustle and bustle of the holidays behind us, now is the perfect time to buckle down and set our priorities in order. I’m sure many of you experience what we experience: a hectic schedule of running around to a host of events with friends, family, and church—normal routines all but forgotten. Nap schedules, school schedules, regular chore responsibilities, and even family devotional times all suffer some disarray during the busy season with all the traveling and outings. Likewise, the flood of gifts from well-intentioned family members can at times shift our focus away from Christ (the Reason for the season) and toward materialism.

We find that the wind-down after the holidays is always the perfect time for refocus and reestablishment of longstanding priorities. For us, the New Year is also a time of reflection and evaluation of those priorities. Cindy and I discuss what we have accomplished in the year—how the children are doing, how we are doing, our ministry, our personal finances, work—all the different aspects of our household. We talk about what is working and what is not. We see how reality measures up with our expectations—both long and short-term. We decide if changes are needed and discuss what those changes should be. We praise God for the successes and grow wiser from the failures. Nothing is wasted as we press on to be the best parents, spouses, and Christians we can be.

Over the years, one area that has continued to be of utmost importance to us is how we are meeting our Biblical responsibilities in raising our children. We ask ourselves some tough questions:

  • Is God pleased with our discipleship efforts?
  • Is the Word getting in our children’s hearts?
  • Does the children’s character reflect the values that God values? (Does ours as parents?—that can be an “ouch!”)
  • Are we teaching them the Word sufficiently with our devotional times?
  • Are we making the most of the “teachable moments” of life?
  • Is our effort measuring up with Deuteronomy 6:6-7 and Ephesians 6:4?

    These are the standards God sets for us, and we try to take our responsibility seriously. Are we perfect? Absolutely not! That’s why we need to introspectively search out these things; we want to make sure that we are putting in our best effort in our high calling as parents and as followers of Christ. As we identify any areas of weakness, we can proactively plan on how to make progress in our spiritual growth.

    I encourage you to also have these discussions with your spouse. Ask yourself those tough questions. Determine if you are doing everything you can do. If God convicts you that you should be doing more, seek His guidance and make this year the year you will put forth your absolute best efforts in imparting God’s Word to your children’s hearts.

    Personally, we have discovered that proactive teaching during family devotional times greatly reduces the frequency and seriousness of day-to-day disciplinary events. We have likewise found that it is those real-time “teachable moments” that allow God’s Word to travel the 18 inches from the children’s minds to their hearts. Reading the Word is necessary, but teaching the Word during real-life situations has a much more lasting effect.

    One tool that has been extremely helpful for us in this area is a binder of character-themed Bible verses. These verses have become vital for both leading family devotional times and capturing those real-time discipleship opportunities, or “teachable moments.” If you recognize a need for some over-haul in this area (and who doesn’t?), we have recently compiled these themed verses in a 150+ page binder, with a thorough table of contents and index for easy use. (Visit here if you wish to learn more.) Values-Driven Discipleship: Biblical Instruction and Character Training Manual could be the blessing your family needs to shore up this all-important area in your home. It has blessed ours! But please, by all means, continue to fulfill the sacred trust God has given you and resolve, in this new year, to actively disciple your children.

    • Works for Me Wednesday: Children and Chores

    valuesdr

    OK, we all know that it’s important to get our kids to help with household tasks. It’s great for character development, helps to prepare them for “real life,” and it keeps you (Mom) from going crazy trying to do it all yourself.

    Training in this area is important, and that’s a whole other subject. However, there are also some practical things I’ve implemented that Work for Me in the area of “children and chores.”

    One of the most basic things that children can be trained to do is put dishes away. My 18 month-old is currently helping her three year-old sister to unload the dishwasher during job time. This was next-to-impossible for my oldest son to do when he was this age. Why? Because, like many of you, I thought the dishes had to go in the uppler level of cabinets. That’s where everyone keeps them, right? And little ones can’t reach up there! So what has worked for me is to put all of our dishes in a lower (floor-level) cabinet instead. Yes, it’s a bit awkward for us adults to bend down there to get a plate when needed, BUT, it enables the littlest ones to put dishes away (easily and safely)–not to mention set the table at meal time! (Note: I still keep glassware in the upper cabinet; the kids just put the glassware on the table or leave it in the dishwasher and I put those away myself!)

    Do you have toddlers who always want to “help” but aren’t really much help at all just yet? They just seem to wander around the house making trouble with everyone else’s cleaning job, don’t they?! Often during our daily task time, I’ll give my toddler a broom and a dustpan and ask her to sweep different areas of the floor. She doesn’t really “do” anything, but she feels important and helpful (and she stays out of trouble, which is the idea!). At other times, I’ll dampen a dishcloth and ask her to clean the table top or dining room chairs. If I show her how to do it and make a big deal out of her efforts, she’ll usually keep going on her own for quite a while. Or, try filling a spray bottle with plain water; give her the spray bottle and a washcloth and have her spray and wipe different surfaces (even the floor) to “clean” them.

    I also make up “checklists” so that the children know what steps need to be completed for a given job. I often include line drawings or clip art so even my pre-readers can see what needs to be done. I’ve posted such lists on the washing machine to coach the kids through putting their own laundry in (I took actual digital photos of the process for this one!). I also made a “clean bathroom” list, and have another list posted in the barn so they remember to check the food and water, etc., for all the outdoor animals. It’s amazing how helpful this can be. My husband is a project manager, and he constantly reminds me that one of the most basic principles of successful project management is to “write it down!”

    These are just a few of the things that “work for me” in helping my children to be more helpful around the house. Feel free to share your ideas by commenting! And don’t forget to visit Shannon at Rocks in My Dryer for more “Works for Me Wednesday” tips!

    Works For Me Wednesday: A Different Day for Christmas

    valuesdr

    I’ve been wanting to take part in the “Works for Me Wednesday” blog carnival hosted by Shannon over at Rocks in my Dryer. The practicality of it makes a lot of sense to me. Unfortunately, I’ve been slow to jump in and have just decided to do it today! Of course, while I have lots of neat ideas, I discovered that there’s been an impromptu “Christmasy” theme announced. So I’ll try to comply.

    What have I done to de-stress Christmas? First, I’ll have to tell you what “stresses” me, and then go from there. The biggest thing we struggle with is over-indulgence. It could be over-indulgence of food, sensory overload, trying to fit too much into the schedule, or (for the children) too many presents, too fast!

    There are a couple of reasons why the gifting frenzy bothers me. First, in a season where we as Christians are claiming to celebrate Christ’s birth, we’re too easily drawn into focusing on ourselves and what we’re getting, rather than what we’re giving (and what we’ve already been given–the gift of Jesus!) Not that there’s much we can do about that–we (as parents) want to bless our children, as do all of our family members. That’s a good thing! But when we go from one party to the next and open gift after gift after gift, it’s easy to lose that spirit of thankfulness that God would want us to have. I’m sure I’m not the only parent to notice this.

    So what works for me? Well, this year we tried celebrating Christmas in November. Jenna from “Choosing Home” commented that she’s considered celebrating Christmas in January for their family! Although it’d be too late for the rest of y’all to celebrate “Christmas in November,” maybe you could space out your celebrations and set some special time aside for your nuclear family to enjoy and appreciate one another and focus on the best blessing–Jesus Christ. Maybe it won’t be until after the new year–but does it really matter? We’re finding that even though we’ve done our “family” Christmas early, there’s still plenty of presents under the tree for the children to open on Christmas day. And having cut back on the amount that they’ll be opening all-at-once, hopefully they will be able to enjoy their gifts that much more, and be more thankful for each one and for each person who gave them.